Here for auction is my first 'lot' (PWEI 001).

Also described in glamourous literary fashion at James Brown's 'Sabotage Times' website.

http://www.sabotagetimes.com/music/adam-mole-needs-a-caravan-so-hes-selling-his-pwei-memorabilia/

‘The Designers Republic’ PWEI long-sleeved 'Diametric Sound Systems' football style shirt.

Dating from 1994. I can't recall if this was on general sale or just manufactured for band and crew but this shirt is rare. In fact it's history makes it 'one of a kind'. I have cut out the label but size is 'Large'. It's in excellent condition... apart from the two small flame-based accidents described below.

I wore this very shirt when PWEI performed ‘Ich Bin Ein Auslander’ on ‘The Word’ for Channel 4. We played 'live' featuring ‘Fun-Da-Mental'.

I am the handsome devil playing guitar and funnily enough wearing this shirt

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udXOhGzNgrY

We asked 'Fun-Da-Mental' to produce a remix. 

They arrived a little unprepared. Rich March our bass player and by now master programmer thankfully agreed to co-ordinate the studio process.

The rest of us were under pressure to utilise the studio time and write some b-sides. 

From memory Graham worked on his idea 'c.p.i.#2' in one corner of the 'live room'; me, Clint and Fuzz worked in another on a tune called 'Intense'. 

The two bands didn't really bond, there were management 'scuffles' over credits... 'who did what'... 'how the track should be marketed' and 'God knows what'! 

They slagged us off in the press, in particular for a lack of any hard- hitting political stance evident in the 'Auslander' video.

Our biggest ever headline shows at Aston Villa Leisure Centre were imminent. The gigs were to feature multiple, highly diverse hand picked support bands including 'Fun-Da-Mental'.

Under the banner 'Amalgamation' the gigs promoted harmony, understanding and respect. Oh dear!

PWEI were never confrontational so just 'let it flow'! Our partisan crowd weren't so forgiving... 

When rehearsals for 'The Word' were booked tensions were high. Ultimately though, I believe this added to the performance and personally, this is my favourite version of the song... the collaboration had come good... really good! Yo!

I can't remember whether it was more a group condolence to the fact ‘Huffty’ was co-presenting 'The Word' that night rather than the infinitely more tasty Dani Behr, (no offence... but come on), or an appreciative nod in the direction of fellow guests Cypress Hill but I got involved in the smoking of an odd cigarette. I had never smoked before so struggled with Ikea style instruction on whether I should blow, suck or simply fumble. I did all three!

Needless to say I didn’t inhale but the consequence of such clumsy herbal expression was a small unwanted, now to become infamous hole languishing centrally in this man made highly-flammable fibrous garment. It still bears the scar.... well it wasn't likely to wash out was it?

On closer inspection there is an almost identical hole in the back of the shirt. I have no idea how I came by this... I guess I wasn't looking but I predict similar pyrotechnic happenings.

Other guests that night from memory were Smashing Pumpkins, Richard Whiteley and Tyra Banks.

Later in the back stage corridor I clearly remember Danniella Westbrook squeezing past me and Rich on her way to party up the West End. She was wearing a sheer see-through blouse and no bra. The bubbly blonde diminutive 'Eastenders' actress asked us how she looked. She looked good, a few weeks later a reliable Sunday newspaper reported that part of her nose fell off… not so good!

I now consider my dubious and rather unfortunate Friday night antic to be 'small potatoes' in comparison, or at the very worst a rather undesirable fashion faux pas in an otherwise unblemished wardrobe.

Two weeks later the 'News Of The World' magazine ran a photograph from that very night of the ever popular TV cockney character resplendent in immaculate see-through blouse coming out of a West End nightclub looking like she had the most excellent of nights.

That same night in my PWEI 'lot 001' shirt I also partied in London and came to question why my illustrious face had never appeared in the disgraced national Sunday newspaper.

I thought about my sullied shirt and I thought about her sheer blouse and it all became clear... crystal clear...

Danniella Westbrook a.k.a 'Sam Butcher' was a highly cherished ever-popular household name loved by seventeen million TV viewers three times each week.

Pop Will Eat Itself with Fun-Da-Mental, alas sounding more like a household cleaner than a household name had just appeared maybe before half a million people, half of which were probably either drunk or asleep, the other half most likely already switched channel once they realised Dani Behr wasn't gracing 'The Word' that historical Friday night. 

Fair enough really!

Adam Mole, man of infinite taste, very little talent, holes in his shirt and no caravan.

P.s It's very unlikely you will be able to bid on Danniella's desireable blouse, you can however bid on Adam Mole's undesireable football style shirt!

Happy bidding!!!