Hear ye, hear ye! Welcome to our humble eBay store, fair buyer! I, a poor Peddler, art pleased to make thine acquaintance!

Behold! the item description thou requirest:

~ Verily, this product is in GREAT CONDITION! 

~ This product hath been TESTED and, behold, it WORKETH!

~ Take heed to ENJOY thy item when thou receiveth it!

~ Please peruse the images and inquire of any queries before thou proceedest to make a purchase. I extend my gratitude for thy perusal. 

~ I beseech thee to contact me ere thou leavest a negative or neutral feedback, that we may resolve any issue that may arise.

~We want thee to know that returns are most welcome here. 

~If thou findest anything amiss with thy purchase, fear not, for thou shalt receive thy money back. 

~And lo, we implore thee to return to our store in the future, for we shall have more wares to list anon. 

Fare thee well!