They'll soon be calling you Sir Smelten John. Or perhaps you can do your own cover version of Bette Midler's I'm Breaking Wind beneath your wings." Can Mason Williams' Classical Gas get even more popular? 

Ready for the next game of "Pull my Finger?" With this compact little hero measuring a mere 8 1/2 inches by 6 1/2 inches and less then a half inch thick, you can secretly store it between the cushions of your favorite barkolouger. You'll be belting our six different forms of gaseous noise at a mere press of one of the keys. The grand kids will think you're superhuman. And you'll accomplish the feat without so much as one muscle contraction. 

No need anymore for clumsy whoopie cushions. Long after their shelf life expires, this piano plays on. You'll have people empyting elevators and rolling down windows with just a few bars of "Old MacDonald." 

Facing a cavity search at customs? We're not sure if this will throw anyone off the trail, but a quick rendition of chopsticks for the lady wearing the latex gloves is worth a try. 

Carefully packed and shipped in a new padded mailer. Takes three AAA batteries (not included).

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